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Tango & Cash

Tango & Cash
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Two cops find love in each other's egos, while attempting to clear their names from a villainous plot to take over the world's salted caramel industry. Stallone and Russell team up for one of the raddest buddy cop dumb-dumb rollercoaster. It's shenanigans.

Tango & Cash is incredibly stupid. There is absolutely no sense of reality here. The villain uses mice, that he loves,  to demonstrate his evilry. He owns monster trucks that have guns mounted on them. Hidden assassin's inside of mirrors (we think) & gun-shoes. Physics don't apply. Time and distance are more of guidelines...

Then there's the leads...wow do they love each other. Let me be clear, if this had been made today, they very well could have been the first openly gay supercops in a major motion picture. They really love each other on the inside and feel passionately about each other's genitals. I'm not making this up. Longing gazes at junk are quite frequent.

With all that, this film rules. It is so much freaking fun and really is a landmark in stupid action movies. It's over the top in all manners with an explosion count in the millions. Toss in some zingers, some puzzling character decisions, wild stunts, and a monster truck and you've got a pre-90's buddy cop blast.

Individual Ratings:

Over the top action:4-star
Cheesy effects:1-star
Horrendous acting:4-star
Ridiculous stunts:3-star
Gratuitous nudity:3-star
Memorable one-liners:4-star

Overall Ratings:

Good Movie Quality: 4-star
Bad Movie Quality:8-star

Prelude to Odds and Evens
Prelude to Tango & Cash

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Sunday, 25 February 2024

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