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The Tomb

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Michelle Bauer stalks around LA in slinky outfits on a quest....for blood! Words, don't fail me now.

One of the highlights of "The Tomb" is its nostalgic charm. The film exudes the distinct '80s vibe, complete with cheesy practical effects, low-budget sets, and a synthesizer-heavy soundtrack with corny beats and crummy lyrics that is very Fred Olen Ray. 

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The Phantom Empire

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A team of treasure hunters find themselves facing off against cannabalistic mole-men, dinosaurs and a busty alien queen who just wants to find nice man and murder everyone else.

Directed by the one and only Fred Olen Rey and featuring the fabulous Sybil Danning, this movie is an absolute blast of a mess from start to finish. Phantom Empire is like a mashup of every wacky idea that a group of friends could come up with during a late-night brainstorming session. It's got everything you could ever imagine: treasure, spaceships, robots, dinosaurs and even an underground civilization! Talk about a buffet of awesomeness.

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Howling II: Your Sister's a Werewolf

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Buckle up for banana business as were-monkey-wolves try to throw a killer birthday party. Every body is invited. Leave your head at the door. It'll be a bloody good time. Ok..well unless Christopher Lee and some townies are party-crashers. Then you'll get shot up pretty good.

When you put Reb Brown next to Sir Christopher Lee, and then have a bunch of guys in Planet of the Apes costumes pretend (or not?) be werewolves, you're destined to have a mind-boggling mess on your hands. This thing is bafflingly bad. The events that transpire are sorta clear, but why they happen is absolutely nonsense. Best we can determine is that a lady's birthday orgy gets interrupted because he brother shows up.

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