The Fantastic Four

Before the flop of 2015, before the two turds in the early 2000s, there was 1994's The Fantastic Four. It's a film that was never meant to be viewed by the eyes of man but we are super happy that we can. We are joined by special guest, bad movie blogger and friend of the show, Brad Slager (@MartiniShark) who knows and loves this movie. Check out Brad's write up on FF at http://www.lifezette.com/popzette/the-first-fantastic-dud/.

While this film was meant to end up in the trashcan and only made in order to keep the film rights to The Fantastic Four (see also 2015), there is such a level of effort that is clear when watching this movie. All the actors are giving it their all. There's a real sense that the people involved really believed in this project rather than it just being a doomed project. Its a classic example of the Internet's definition of a good-bad movie of wanting to make a good movie and ending up with a really bad one.

The film is refreshing because it is a fan boy's dream. Nothing is changed about the origin of the FF, the powers, their characterization, stories, etc. It looks cheesy, its campy and its silly. At no point is there any modernization of things to make them look good on screen. It is just a movie made for fun and not for people to talk about how interesting the origin retelling was (see modern comic adaptations). That makes it great.

The effects are the best part of this film. Their cheesy looking and quite dubious at best. Science happens but we have no idea what the science is. Reed has awesome looking stretchy arms. The Thing's costume is fantastic. Johnny's first "flame-on" and fight with a laser beam is 100% animated.

Doctor Doom...wow. Doom has 0 powers in this film. He's just a guy in a metal mask with money and minions. He can't fight at all. He must rely on all his technology and henchmen to thwart the FF. He's great. I guess if you can consider waving your arms around like a Power Ranger villain a superpower then he's got them.

The FF must also deal with The Jeweler who is a crappy Moleman replacement. His motivations are to woo a kidnapped blind lady with a stolen world's largest diamond. What? She's blind, she can't enjoy a diamond. Idiot.

The script is a laugh-a-second achievement in hokiness. The writer must have bought a stack of silver-age comics to use as inspiration with such gems as:

[Reed slugs Dr. Doom]

Mr. Fantastic: That's for trying to kill me.

[Reed punches Doom again]

Mr. Fantastic: That's for trying to kill my friends... and this is for being a real jerk.

[Reed knocks Doom over the edge of a parapet]

We really loved this movie. Without a doubt, its the best of the 4 Fantastic Four films. It is one hell of a good time with so many plot holes that kept us talking about who and what was happening. Add in a great performance from Alex Hyde-White as the most likable Reed Richards ever on film and you've got a must see movie. It can be argued that it's the 2nd best comic book adaptation of the 90's. We highly recommend it.

Individual Ratings:

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Cheesy effects:
Horrendous acting:
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Gratuitous nudity:
Memorable one-liners:

Overall Ratings:

Good Movie Quality:
Bad Movie Quality: