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Reindeer Games

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Its twists! Its turns! Its lefts and rights! Its yields to oncoming traffics. Its Acme Fake Tunnels slapped onto the side of a cliffs! Ben Afflecks and Charlizes try to give us a shocker and instead we get the upper decker.

Reindeer Games is such a pile of mess. On one side you've got "that friend" that watches this on TNT one night (usually while wishing they were invited to the party you're throwing but you intentionally didn't because they can't play in any reindeer games, OMG you're a total dick, dude) then later comes to you and begs you to watch it with them and then stares at you the whole time until 'the big reveal' and then waits for you to react - you don't and they are shocked. You're not the type of person who will be shocked (you listen to Stinker Madness and know your stuff) and so you're relationship gets even more strained but you feel guilty because of that one time when you were really hard up after your girlfriend (that you thought was at least a 9 but was really more like a 6 and just had a solid set of cans) dumped you for a bartender for a biker bar in a different county and this friend let you stay on their couch while you cried yourself to sleep for three days about 15 years ago. Thanks Frankenheimer!

On the other side, you've got one of the worst heist movies ever made - sure its a failed heist intentionally - yet it could never have worked. Ben Affleck's "Rudy" isn't the wildcard that throws a wrench into the works - these idiots could have NEVER robbed this casino successfully even if the character Nick (who Rudy poses as) was in charge the whole time. Its ineptitude to a point that goes beyond bumbling. Then there's the "plan" (the one that isn't revealed until the end) and then you mentally backtrack through the film, you find about 1000 problems with their masterminding. It's unbelievably stupid no matter how this heist could have gone. No these guys are all dead, no matter how things go.

On top of all that, there's this tone problem. Is it supposed to be funny? Is it supposed to be dark? Is it a Christmas movie? Is it satire, parody, suspense, thrilling, or is there some social commentary that maybe Paul Verhoeven should have been in charge of? This thing tonally shifts like the day Animal discovers the xylophone, yet Animal is one hell of a percussionist and this is Star Wars Kid: The Drummer.

With all that information - this movie is fantastic. Its an absolute must do and is as crazy stupid good time as one can possibly have and we absolutely love it. 

Individual Ratings:

Over the top action:3-star
Cheesy effects:2-star
Horrendous acting:4-star
Ridiculous stunts:2-star
Gratuitous nudity:2-star
Memorable one-liners:3-star
Nonsensical Plot:4-star


Overall Ratings:

Good Movie Quality: 3-star
Bad Movie Quality:7-star

Christmas Twister

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Thursday, 22 February 2024

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