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Dangerous Men

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Get ready to meet the most righteous dudes of movie villians and the most disappearing of protagonists. John Rad gives us one of the biggest and most glorious of trainwrecks in film. Black Pepper is coming your way, buster!

What you've got here is one of those "hey we found this movie, does anyone wanna finish it?" Filmed in the mid-80s this wasn't released until 2005 with an assist from Drafthouse. Much along the lines of Miami Connection its a masterpiece in bad filmmaking by a nice person and cost everything for failure. Sadly the director, John Rad (or Jahangir Salehi by his true name) had this movie sit on a shelf for 20 years and not have it released to the right audience until it was far too late. John died before this movie could do so. But what a gift to leave the world. Thanks John!

While on surface this may have a fairly cliché revenge/lady Punisher plot but wow does this get off course fast. Mina (who may be our protagonist if she hadn't disappeared for 1/2 the movie) goes on a murder spree of rapey dudes after seeing her fiancé murdered by "The Bikers". Her lady vengeance lasts for only 1/5 of her murders before she shifts gears and starts killing random dudes and trans night walkers. All while, David (her dead fiancé's brother) tries to find her by sitting at another detectives desk. Eventually David decides to stalk "The Bikers" which leads him to the top of "The Bikers" food chain (or just the most popular biker, we just aren't clear). Thus the hunt for Black Pepper begins. Yes we don't even know about the antagonist (or if there even is one) until there is only 30 minutes of film left.

Then the worlds greatest 30 minutes in cinema begins.

The Hunt for Black Pepper could be its own movie. The decision to cast Bryan Jenkins (who is Head of the Drug Dealers in the credits - despite there no mention of anyone dealing drugs in the movie AND THAT HIS NAME IS BLACK MFING PEPPER!!!) could be its own documentary. We've been told that Black Pepper is a real bad dude. He'll feed you your own balls. He'd cut his own mom's throat if it benefitted him. He's a BAAAAAAAD dude. And then you meet Black Pepper and you're like "THAT'S Black Pepper?!?!?"

Without Black Pepper, this would probably still be a do. But with the stunning final sequence this movie is Hall of Fame worthy and is a must see. Its fantastic.

Individual Ratings:

Over the top action:3-star
Cheesy effects:4-star
Horrendous acting:4-star
Laugh-out-loud-ability:5-star
Ridiculous stunts:3-star
Gratuitous nudity:4-star
Memorable one-liners:2-star
Nonsensical Plot:4-star

Riffability:5-star

Overall Ratings:

Good Movie Quality: 3-star
Bad Movie Quality:8-star

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Friday, 24 September 2021

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