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Prelude to Volcano

Prelude to Volcano
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Surprise! Volcano! Tommy Lee Jones comes in to ask what magma is and see if his volcano movie of 1997 can be the dumber of the year. We all know its stupid, but how stupid can it be?

Roman's Do's and Don'ts

  • Lust for Freedom (1987) - YouTube
  • Furious (1984) - IMDB
  • The Zero Boys (1986) - IMDB

Wild Card - The Great Superpower Debate

  • Electro-magnetic Telekinesis - 3.5 stars

About Volcano - Movie Information

Sam's Boring Bullshit

As evidenced by the classic 1997 film Volcano, there are some disaster management professionals out there who do not know what magma is, I am then to infer that there are possibly people out there, disaster management professionals or otherwise, who don't know what volcanoes are. I will explain this phenomenon as unscientifically as possible; a volcano is a giant dirt cone that shoots fire sauce out the top, not the good kind of fire sauce either. You put this stuff on your taco and it becomes el taco de la muerte. 

Oddly this film which seems to fumble the science like a greasy over inflated football, was helmed by one Mick Jackson. Jackson, before directing such films as LA Story, The Bodyguard and this pile of crap, had a hand in some of the greatest television ever made. One instance, and his first directorial effort is the James Burke series Connections. If you haven't seen Connections get a seat belt for your brain and buckle up. He would rebound from this film as well as Clean Slate with Dana Carvey, as it was done immediately prior to Volcano, making events for HBO such as the adaptation of Live From Baghdad and Temple Grandin, which won him an Emmy. After 19 years he returns to the silver screen soon with his most recent effort, Denial, which concluded filming in February.

Tommy Lee Jones was a guard on the fabled undefeated 1968 Harvard Football team, that was the team that famously beat Yale 29-29. While at Harvard he was roommates with Al Gore (I bet they still talk). Though it seems like Jones' career was winding down he has been in movies this year, including Jason Bourne, which should stink.

Co-star Anne Heche hadn't done her meltdown yet, that would come 3 years later when she would, while on extacy, ditch her car, walk almost 2 miles thought the desert half naked and then intrude on the home of Araceli Campiz. After a few glasses of water and a shower, Heche just wanted to curl up and watch some movies. That is when Campiz called the police. The subsequent struggles were better chronicled by Barbara Walters and the juicy bits are probably still on YouTube if you actually have the desire to see some one really come apart.

KAEOF:  Don Cheadle who regrets this film, Keith David who doesn't care as long as the Kraft Services are in order and Northern Exposure alum John Corbett who probably was happy about being in the Magma Movie.

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Saturday, 13 April 2024

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