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Friday the 13th: A New Beginning

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We wrap up our Spooktober with a staple from a staple franchise and one of the strangest big box office horror films ever made. This is just a strange film starring "Jason" with lots of head choppins, boobs and a cast of some pretty unusual characters.

So Jason V is one weird film and frankly astounds that it ever frightened anyone...even children. It's seriously gentle in its horror, the plot is not frightening, Jason is not intimidating, and the gore is pretty mild. The MPAA really didn't help out this film at all as it's seriously cut down.

None of it lines up, of course, with any one who cares about continuity or character motivations. The killer doesn't know how revenge works. The hero doesn't know how idolatry works. The film-makers don't know how enchiladas work. It's stunny how little anything works.

BUUUUTTT....that's not why you come to a Jason movie, right? You come for the gore and boobs. Well there's boobs in this one...but the gore is incredibly mild. Most of the deaths occur off-screen and there are only a couple not-worthy ones that still fail to execute fully. So its disappointing there.

However, there's still enough here that isn't part of the Jason staples to show up for. The entire plot and setting is super weird. The cast of characters is simply mind-bending and the single greatest scene in the Friday franchise appears here...in a metal shitbox.

Not great, but still a good revisit.

Individual Ratings:

Over the top action:3-star
Cheesy effects:4-star
Horrendous acting:3-star
Laugh-out-loud-ability:3-star
Ridiculous stunts:2-star
Gratuitous nudity:4-star
Memorable one-liners:2-star
Riffability:4-star

Overall Ratings:

Good Movie Quality: 3-star
Bad Movie Quality:6-star

Streaming Do's and Don'ts

About Friday the 13th V: A New Beginning - Movie Information

Sam's Boring Bullshit

The whole franchise is a mess. Paramount was able to use it perfectly however. They would cash in on all 8 of the installments produced at the studio until the franchise was released to New Line Cinema, who would also cash in.  The series would gross $380 million domestically against an $80 million dollar combined budget. The only film that under performed was Jason X which did little beyond breaking even, probably because it was set in space – totally unbelievable.

This is the 4th film in the series to feature Jason Voorhees as the villain, and the third to have him wearing his signature hockey mask and jumpsuit combo. Well, sort of.  This is actually a guy named Roy who is copycatting, so this movie may have as much to do with the rest of the series as its counterparts, very little.

After Friday the 13th part 4: The Final Chapter, made all of the cash again, Frank Mancuso Jr. slapped this thing together with abandoned scenes and elements from 3 and 4.  He brought in Danny Steinmann to direct as well as finish the script, or, rather, add to the scene pile and turn it into a script. Steinmann had previously done actual rated x pictures. The sex and violence were super heavy and after nearly uncountable trips to the MPAA, the film was reduced to the R version we have here. It is still pretty chesty but the gore is noticeably removed. The final product makes almost no sense and can barely move in a straight line story wise, but it made all the cash so paramount shit out 3 more.

Phenomenon
Sleepwalkers

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Tuesday, 21 November 2017

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