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Prelude to Blood Freak

Prelude to Blood Freak
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In early preparation for Thanksgiving, Jackie gets a headstart with pulling the trigger on a turkey of a movie from 1972, 3 weeks early. But that's OK because it's a spooky tale about a motorcycle guy who smokes some pot and gets turned into a murderous turkey. Just like your family.

Special Segment - Films we've seen the most in a given period of time

  • Jackie - Care Bears Movie, The Beastmaster, Love Actually
  • Justin - CondormanBatman, Fight Club
  • Sam - Rambo II, Encino Man, The A-Team, Children of Men

The Wild Card - Who Would Win in a Knife Fight

  • A Thanksgiving Turkey vs The Easter Bunny

About Blood Freak - Movie Information

Sam's Boring Bullshit

Gobble gobble, it’s turkey time. Not the kind of turkey that J-Lo has in her pants. Did J-Lo ad lib that? Does that mean that in her pants she has a full turkey ensemble; a snood, wattle and major caruncle? Perhaps it is just the character “Ricki/Rochelle” who has mean roast beef curtains, because otherwise what the hell is she talking about? See (or hear rather) our Gigli episode for more.

This week with turkey day just around the corner, Jackie has picked a turkey of a film, which actually has turkey in it, plenty of turkey. Brad F. Grinter, and I am guessing that the F stands for Frank, as he can’t decide whether to go by Brad or Frank throughout his not illustrious career, teams up with Steve Hawkes to direct this morality tale. Brad or Frank or whoever the fuck he is serves as narrator while Steve, who was able to pick one name, serves as the films lead. It would appear the two of them were able to string this thing together for $25k. Even in 1972 that isn’t much money to make a movie on. I will assume since I haven’t seen this yet that it was shot on 16mm and available light, because that is what you get for $25k even in 1972. This isn’t technically a student film, because director Brad or Frank or whoever the fuck he is was teaching the class, yes the films entire cast is Grinter’s acting class. If they’re anything like the acting classes I used to witness when I worked at the talent agency then look out Sir Anthony Hopkins, you are about to be out shittied. I doubt Sir Ben Kinglsey is looking over his shoulder, there can’t possibly be a worse on screen death than his in Slipstream. Grinter’s brother Randy Grinter Jr is also in the film, meaning that their fathers name was Randy, or Steve, the Grinters can’t pick a fucking name. Possibly the most ironic thing about this film is though it is pandering towards a pro Christian, anti-drug Ideal, it originally received an X rating.

KAEOF: Firstly we need a turkey count, for no other reason than I like to say turkey count. Secondly we should probably do a sideburn count as well. Thirdly let’s watch to see how convincing the leg/table saw sequence is as they used a real amputee and it probably got them the X rating. Lastly the sex scene that is all about not having sex.

Blood Freak
Order of the Black Eagle

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Monday, 23 September 2019

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