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Black Christmas

Black Christmas
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When you've been stuck in an attic, are literally yellow, and forced to be your mom's sperm donor for your whole life, you're probably going to have some issues. So pick up your pokey objects and take some eyeballs out in the name of Santa!

The problem here is that this film, while somewhat entertaining, is just too generic and blasé. It's a slasher with fairly little imagination. When you come into a slasher film, you're here for one thing - ridiculous death scenes. This film does NOT have that. There's fairly vague death scenes (oh the camera cut away, the horror!), there's "deaths" that people wouldn't actually die from (such as a tiny icicle shattering through your skull, dropped from a height of 3 feet), and pretty meh makeup. The obsession with eyeball mutilation is over done and gets old after the first two eyeball sequences.

HOWEVER, the plot is super-super stupid. There's two killers, spoilers (too late). And they are possibly the worst, least effective slashers in the history of film. As mentioned, most people wouldn't die from their injuries inflicted, one lady dies on complete accident, and two of them die from impossibility, leaving 3 actual murders accomplished and 1 girl to go ahead and kill the slashers. Meaning out of 12 people, only 3 of them die. Pretty good work guys. Jason or Freddy would have tore through these dumb girls in about 15 minutes.

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Killer Workout

Killer Workout
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We dig into David A. Prior's bouncy lady bits slasher film from 1987, starring Marcia Karr, Fritz Matthews, and superior badass Ted Prior (who all were in the epic Deadly Prey). It's the tale of murder at the aerobics gym that also has a weight room for the tough guys. It's cheesy, with incredible 80's music, Ted and Fritz punching each other just cause, and so much bouncing and splits. 

Some of you may know this film as it's other title of Aerobicide but it's labeled as Killer Workout in IMDB so that's what we are going with here. Hope Amazon knows what the hell they are doing. Either way both titles are great.

While this movie is no Deadly Prey, it is still a really good time. Especially if you like bouncing lady parts. I can not understate how much bouncy lady parts there are in this film. It's great because the gym never stops having ladies in leotards doing jumping jacks even though there's murders happening at the same time and cops are pulling bodies out. Still gotta make that aerobics class. Probably due to high gym fees.

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Prelude to Killer Workout

Prelude to Killer Workout
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Presented by Dr. Lecter's Killer Workout. Sorry Tina Turner and Chuck Norris, but Dr. Lecter needs your body more than you do.

We are back! After a three week hiatus, we've returned in full force with this weeks fine episode. We prepare for our second David A. Prior film entitled Killer Workout aka Aerobicide from 1987. We pay tribute to the late Mr. Prior who will be sorely missed. Make sure to pre-order your blu-rays of Killer Workout, Deadly Prey AND Deadliest Prey which release on Oct. 13, 2015 (Buy Here).

Streaming Do's and Don'tsStar Trek: Insurrection - Amazon PrimeHeroes of the East - NetflixGood Neighbor, Bad Neighbor - The Indiana Jones specialDr. Marcus BrodyShortroundSalah

 

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