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C.H.O.M.P.S.

C.H.O.M.P.S.
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C.H.O.M.P.S. is like a slow painful death from a stab wound in the tummy while getting your head pressed in an iron maiden. It's awful. Even if you are a dog lover, you will want this annoyance to cease to exist within 30 minutes. 

Seriously, Jackie and Justin own 3 dogs and they are part of our family. We are huge dog lovers. But nothing can excuse this little bastard. You want him to die and when he finally explodes you instead of feeling bad, are thrilled because its at least a few minutes where you don't have to be assaulted visually and aurally by this movie. 

There is nothing redeeming for the film. Yes it has bad acting and yes its really stupid but these two items are masked by the overly intrusive soundtrack and the unending smorgasbord of generic sound effects that C.H.O.M.P.S. makes while he gallivants around town. There is nothing good here to be had.

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Galgameth

Galgameth
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When you absolutely must rescue your vague kingdom from a usurper with unknown motivations and restore your position as the supreme ruler of the lands, reach for a Galgameth statue and squirt some tears on it. Just make sure you don't ever go near an ocean. It's the Adventure or Legend or just Galgameth and he's one family friendly Kaijū!

Galgameth is one of those movies that has no target audience. It's too dumb and childish for adults but has too many adult themes for little kids. The protagonist is a pre-teen but there's too much cutesy stuff to fit that demographic. It's like there's a 2 week window when a boy is about 11 and isn't sure if they should be kissing girls or playing with action figures that this movie might work for.

There's some pretty great stuff in this one though for bad movie lovers. There is some possible moral tale about cats being evil and dogs being good, some seriously cheesy special effects, a poorly shot dummy that clearly gets crushed by Galgameth, some awful swordplay, some pretty crummy costumes, possible stuntmen injured by burning rocks and pretty dumb dialogue. It's very easy to riff and great to discuss the stupid parts.

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Damnation Alley

Damnation Alley
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Jan Michael Vincent and George Peppard go for a long ride across the American wasteland in a mega-truck. Along the way they find hill-billies, clever kids, mutated bugs and giant man-eating scorpions. Sounds exciting right? It's not.

The film itself is pretty much just riding around in the mega-truck for long periods of time. The action is few and far between and when it happens it truly looks terrible. The sky on fire is one of the worst effects ever "captured" on film and is where most of the money went. It's truly a shame as if they'd just spent the budget and time elsewhere this may have been a good time. Instead, the movie consists of:

blow up worldblow up only safe placedrive to Albanyget a bump on the head and die, get eaten by cockroaches, get raped by mutant rednecks, pick up a junior sized Peyton Manning, float motorhome from Detroit to AlbanyProfit?

We wish that we could give this a stamp of approval but unfortunately it's a waste of time.

Individual Ratings:

Over the top action:Cheesy effects:Horrendous acting:Laugh-out-loud-ability:Ridiculous stunts:Gratuitous nudity:Memorable one-liners:

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Prelude to Damnation Alley

Prelude to Damnation Alley






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Brought to you by Nuke Juice, the only energy drink for a nuclear wasteland traveler.

We pack up and ride in our Landmaster as we prepare for a post-apocalyptic world in Damnation Alley. Sam shares his usual keen info on the movie, Jackie throws some more bad movie trivia your way and we all review our Netflix and Amazon streaming movies for the week.

We first announce our 12 Days of Bad Christmas Movies Podcrawl/VideoCrawl.  Imagine 4 shows, 3 movies each during each week leading up to Christmas. Let us know if you'd like to be involved by emailing This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. OR follow on Twitter by following @StinkerMadness or #12daysofbadxmasmovies.

Netflix Do's and Don'tsMovie NameSummaryIMDBNetflixAmazonJustinJackieSamTotalThe Devil's 8

A federal agent rounds up eight convicts to help fight a vicious moonshine gang.

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Prelude to The Man From Hong Kong

Prelude to The Man From Hong Kong






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Presented by Fifty Shades of Brown, the story of two lovers tied together by raunchy flatulents.

We gear up for an ass-kicker of a movie in The Man From Hong Kong or Dragon Flies. We also review more Netflix and Amazon Instant Movies, more ongoing movie trivia and perhaps the best opening commercial we've ever done - Fifty Shades of Brown trailer.

Netflix Do's and Don'tsMovie NameSummaryIMDBNetflixAmazonJustinJackieSamTotalThe Serpent and the Rainbow

An anthropologist goes to Haiti after hearing rumors about a drug used by black magic practitioners to turn people into zombies.

It's ok...there's a lot of silly business. It really takes itself seriously but it kinda falls a little flat here and there. One might say though that it is a very "efficient" movie. Just don't expect wild times.

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The Official Streaming Movies Do's and Don'ts (Netflix and Amazon Prime)

The Official Streaming Movies Do's and Don'ts (Netflix and Amazon Prime)








































































Welcome to the future and let's face it, we don't watch movies on DVD, Blu-Ray, on TV or even in the theater that much anymore. Because we live in the future we have access to an unprecedented amount of films that we have seen, are familiar with and, for the most part, never heard of. A lot of us are left with choosing movies online solely based off the cover art. We call this "rolling the dice". Well we've done our best to take the guess work out of it for you and present each week in our 0.5 (prelude) episodes of our Stinker Madness podcast the films we've watched on Netflix, Amazon Prime, Crackle, and YouTube during the week. If we like it we give it a Do, if not we give it a Don't. If we are indifferent - then you're on your own.

Check out our ongoing list hereStreaming Do's and Don'tsMovie NameSummaryIMDBNetflixAmazonJustinJackieSamTotalThe Devil's 8

A federal agent rounds up eight convicts to help fight a vicious moonshine gang.

Heavily recommended to us by a good source, but a disappointment to us. Boring, confusing, and weird as hell. But the theme song at the end that explains the plot is pretty awesome. A perfect RiffTrax option.

IMDB PageWatch NowDevil's EightNoNoNo0/3 Invasion of the Bee Girls

A powerful cosmic force is turning Earth women into queen bees who kill men by wearing them out sexually.

Totally weird and a complete cut & paste of 70's b-movies. William Smith is awesome. There's tons of boobs. And it's REALLY silly. And yes they are made of bees.

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Prelude to Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

Prelude to Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves
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This 0.5 episode is sponsored by Bryan Adam's Lost LOST Recordings as we get ready for Kevin Costner's to charm our way through the turd that is Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. This movie was a mega-blockbuster and we wouldn't be surprised of the amount of people that have no clue that this movie sucks so bad. It's cheesy, poorly acted, completely unbelievable, doesn't make any sense, and no one knows it. There's a cast of thousands with Christian Slater (ugh), Morgan Freeman, Alan Rickman and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio; all of them mail it in except for Costner and Slater who act as best as they can. Justin and Sam have history with this movie. Justin loved it when he was 14 years old. When it came out on DVD, Justin bought it immediately. Him and Sam then watched and immediately afterwards drove to Hastings to sell it back. They would only give him $.50 for it, so Justin threw it out the window of his car. Sorry environment. Blame Costner.

We start by wishing Sam a happy birthday (he now smells of Ben Gay.....cause he's old). We also want to share our YouTube channel specifically Our Recommended Movies playlist. These movies are completely free and are some of the best stinkers we've found on there. We'll try to keep this updated as time goes on. If you have any suggestions for movies to add to it that you find, please either email us at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or visit our forums and let us know.

Stinker News

The Power Rangers are going to be back in theaters in 2016 - we all put this on our "not to do" list

Universal Studios is rebooting classic monster movies from the 1930's. - Dracula is on the way and then a Mummy movie. Hopefully, we'll also see Frankenstein and the Wolfman.

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Prelude to Flash Gordon

Prelude to Flash Gordon












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Presented by The 1980 Hawkman Rocket Cycle. Never fly blind through victory again!

Jackie gets us ready for one of the most popular bad movies of all time as Sam J Jones hits us in the face with his metaphorical football. Get pumped for Freddie Mercury (God rest his soul) and the rest of Queen, Max Von Sydow, Timothy Dalton, and sweeeeeettt costumes! Flash! AAAAWWWWW.

Streaming Do's and Don'tsMovie NameSummaryIMDBNetflixAmazonJustinJackieSamTotalAfter Midnight

Horror anthology about a college professor (Zada) teaching a course called "The Psychology of Fear". He brings his students (including psychic McWhirter) to his home, one dark and stormy night to tell scary stories. The first involves a young couple whose car breaks down by an old, abandoned house. The second has four trendy teenage girls getting lost in a bad part of town, and chased by a pack of vicious dogs. Last, we have Helgenberger confronting a stalker at the answering service where she works the night shift.

Normally, we like anthology movies as they are usually silly and don't take themselves too seriously. This is not one of those types. Sam and Justin did not enjoy it in the least. Jackie loses her mind and likes this film.

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Prelude to Never Too Young to Die

Prelude to Never Too Young to Die












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Presented by Vanity Off. For when you really just need Vanity to go back to Prince.

This episode John Stamos' hair gets the spot light (and the mousse) as we get ready for a gem of a turd in Never Too Young to Die with Stamos, Vanity (again), and George Lazenby and Gene Simmons (calling Dr. Love?). Sam brings us this direct-to-video movie that Jackie nor Justin has ever heard of.

We start out talking about Vanity and what she's done other than Action Jackson and Never Too Young to Die.  Apparently, she's in 52 Pickup which Sam calls "the most underrated movie, ever" However, Vanity doesn't really participate much in 52 Pickup so that doesn't really count. 2/3 Stinker Madness hosts think she's gross but Sam is all about Vanity's charm and looks.

Streaming Do's and Don'tsMovie NameSummaryIMDBNetflixAmazonJustinJackieSamTotalBeneath The Planet of the Apes

The sole survivor of an interplanetary rescue mission searches for the only survivor of the previous expedition. He discovers a planet ruled by apes and an underground city run by telepathic humans.

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Prelude to Action Jackson

Prelude to Action Jackson















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This episode is brought to you by the Invisible Slip. Because you really want everyone to see your ass through your dress.

Justin gets to choose this week and he's dialed up a classic in Carl Weather's Action Jackson. How long can Vanity keep her shirt on? Get super pumped (but don't hurt yourself).

We start out by discussing "The Brimley Awards" from the If We Made It podcast. You may remember Jeff and Tucker guesting on our "The Beastmaster" episode. Those guys are great and really funny. Check out the whole Brimley Awards episode from Jeff and Tucker.  I think you might hear Sam laughing once.

If We Made It Podcast - The Brimley Awards

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